Scrutiny of religion.

Many years ago I became a born-again Christian. Caught up in the enthusiasm and with a strong sense of mission, I decided it would be a very good idea to study Religious Knowledge for A level. For the next few days I went looking for a school that still provided the subject at the required level in its curriculum. This was not that easy task since of all the available "ologies" about, "theology" was by far the least fashionable at the time. Eventually however I discovered a school which cannot have been particularly happy at the financial implications of having just having two very determined pupils and a teacher who for some inexplicable reason was prepared to teach the subject.

It was a little strange to be working in a large, virtually empty classroom. The first impression I had of my classmate proved correct. He always sat just behind me as if to oversee every operation in that room as a general. At times he would lift up his desk lid and slam it down hard so I was never entirely relaxed during lessons. This totally unnerving academic genius produced homework  good enough for publication. To break the monotony which comes, I believe, from already knowing all the answers, he would sometimes lean back, shut his eyes as if to relax and allow me to answer a question.

Looking back on those times I still find it incredible to think of me as a sixteen year old having this opportunity to learn. Spiritual journeys can however develop a tendency to proceed in some quite unexpected directions. With very little regard for my conversion experience which had been very much a matter of belief, some dramatic under-pinning took place almost straight away.

The first lesson we were introduced to the synoptic problem. Although this method of comparing gospel narratives proved quite an unnerving problem, from that moment I was hooked. Form criticism came a few weeks later. I struggled at first to understand the concept although an image of the four evangelists each happily constructing a patchwork quilt using all their favourite items of mostly oral history has remained with me every since. Within a few weeks, my missionary enthusiasm had been transformed into those skills necessary to become a detective. Supported initially by that course, I was ready to be objective, identify with honesty centuries of Church politics and tradition to find the historical Jesus.

Perhaps it was inevitable that a Seeker after truth should discover Quakers at some point along the way. The company of those who traditionally place so high a regard on the importance of honesty, can be very reassuring on that journey.

When you are looking for something however, it does seem very important that you do not loose sight of the focus of your investigation. Like any investigation, there might well be prophets with different priorities, inaccurate, misleading observations, those who distort the evidence and whether intentionally or otherwise, put you off track. In our enthusiasm to dispense with knowledge that does not seem relevant to our condition, there may be a temptation to become arrogant. I am reminded here of my very clever classmate who would deliberately allow me to answer some of the questions.  Quakers can seem at times to be a little caught up in their own opinions.

In our search for truth there may be a tendency to "throw the baby out with the bath water" or watch in rather an uncaring way as a crucial aspect of the ministry of early Friends slips slowly down the plug-hole. We may at times put in additional understanding to the mix, to scent the water, making certain challenging truths more comfortable to our taste. Some Quakers forget to turn the taps off by refusing to use their minds, or by having dialogue with other faiths. Lately and perhaps most worrying of all, there has been a growing tendency to leave room entirely and so let the baby drown

It may be misleading to evaluate a course entirely by the exams. My classmate excelled, passed with the top grade and simultaneously gained a scholorship to Oxford. Although my results were not that great, I gained a love for my subject which has remained a passion. Whilst it might have seemed to others that this opportunity to study Religious Knowledge with some exceptional competition, would undermine my faith, or seem disrespectful, I discovered that honesty scrutiny can be very beneficial to religion. It would seem to me that we have been given our minds and each a unique set of evidence for a reason. Our role should be to trust in the power of the truth, take on the challenge of a spiritual journey, engage with our beliefs, because a house built upon rock will last.